"It well may be
That we will never meet again
In this lifetime
So let me say before we part
So much of me
Is made of what I learned from you
You'll be with me
Like a handprint on my heart
And now whatever way our stories end
I know you have re-written mine
By being my friend..."
This was the part of the song, "For good" that I got to sing at Whit's funeral. What a heart-wrencher, right? I love it though because it puts into words exactly how I feel. Well I remember the first couple of weeks of September like it was yesterday. I got a phone call from our friend Kate, around the first of September telling me that Whit wasn't going to make much longer. My worst fears came true. How was I going to get through this? Was I going to make it down to say goodbye to her? Was I strong enough to see her? It was memorial day weekend, the weekend that we were all supposed to be at the Gorge together, crazy huh. I drove down saturday morning and it was the longest drive of my life. I got to Whits parents house in Washington, Ut, and I went in to see Whit. I don't think anyone or anything could have prepared me. I can't even express the heartache I felt seeing her in the lazy boy. Her mom and her friend trying to help her be as comfortable as possible. They let me have some time with her and Jared. She couldn't talk and her eyes were closed but we all knew that Whitni could hear us. I sat there by her side trying to be strong and fighting back tears. No one wants to see their best friend suffer like that.
Since I was down there, Whit's mom decided it was a great time to practice the song for the funeral. Whit's mom's friend was singing with me, we started practicing in the living room and I got to my part. It well may be that we will never meet again..... I lost it. It didn't help that I don't like to sing in front of people but the fact that Whit was in the other room made it that much more difficult. We practiced a few times and then planned to practice the next day with our accompanist. Kate was nice enough to let me stay with her over the weekend. Sunday, Kate, Jared, Jared's parents, and I went to church. After I got to spend more time with Whit and her family and friends. I got to witness the sweetest thing. Whit's little twin nephews came over and Holly brought them in to see Whit and Whit put a smile on her face and she mumbled something. It was the sweetest thing and the last time I saw a smile on Whit's face. I felt the spirit so strong in that room. I know it was cause the vail was so thin and I loved that they had hilary weeks music playing all weekend long.
That night we went over to start working on whit's casket. Jared came over and spent some time with us and then we got a phone call that she wasn't going to make it much longer. I am so glad that Jared was able to make it back to be there. We got a call and they invited us over to the house. It was nice to share tears and hugs with whits family. Whitni looked so peaceful and beautiful. I was so hard to kiss her goodbye but she was in a better place now.
Words cannot express the love I have for Whit. I always told her she was my Ultimate Best Friend. She always had great wisdom for me, we never fought, we were so similar but in many ways so different. She was my sister. She made me a better person. It is rare when you find a friendship like that. It is such a hard thing for me to lose a friendship like that. I am so grateful that I Heavenly Father crossed our paths even though it was cut short. I am so grateful that I had Whit in my life. Because I knew her I was changed for good. She continued to teach me through out her cancer. Not once was she mad at God. She was a huge strength to me and she will continue to do be with the memories that I will cherish forever.
Monday, I went to Jill's parents house and we worked on the casket. It turned out so beautiful and it was so nice to be around people who were feeling the same way I was. I am so grateful that I was able to share this weekend with Whit's family and friends.
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